Moving Forward

Friends are definitely the ones who keep on driving my forward.

I was at AF's earlier just sitting there drinking and thinking about what am I going to do with myself for the next year and after graduate. I thought of PC who is absolutely smart, I thought of SH who is trying to figure things out like me, and CC who is study in the country I really want to be.

I was planing on having a break and maybe work for a while or so, just like TK, a friend of mine. Or maybe like BW, who just do something totally different then what he studied. At the same time I want to be in grad school like all my grad students. I don't think I can ever really leave school, I know I will be back no matter what.

There are so many plat form in front of me, setting a model so that I know which one I can follow. I think I know what I am going to do. I am going to take the exam before the end of the year, send out the application even though I will never be ready to leave Boulder.

No, I am not ready to leave Boulder. I just really love to stay here, but I know there is no way for me to stay. I was actually freaking out about that for a while and messaging HG and TH, I just want to... stay here forever. There are just too much things I cannot let go here. Boulder is the place that shaped me, it is the place full of my memories, it is a place that just amazed me every single day, it is just hard to say goodbye to a place that just has so much to explore.

I guess I have to leave no matter what. I might not get a job in Boulder just so that it will be easier for me to cut off from it. I will take the exam, send out the applications, and just move to another city, try to fit in and make new friends all over again. I am not ready for that, but I will do it. I am not ready to leave, but I will be excited to start my next journey.

Because of your experiences, I am moving forward. Thank you guys, you are the force that keeps me moving.